Dalmation Jokes

Riley, Michael and Tyler were on a bus home from school. All of a sudden a fire-truck zoomed past them. They all saw the dalmation in the front of the truck sitting beside the driver. Michael said "Hey, don't they use those dogs to clear out the crowd at a scene of a fire?" Riley rudely interrupted saying "No stupid, the firemen use the dogs for good luck charms." Fed up with his friends, Tyler interjected saying, "How come you guy's are so dumb? The fireman who drives the truck uses the dalmation to spot out the fire hydrant closest to the fire!!!"

A hound dog and a dalmation were sitting in an Internet cafe and the dalmation said to the hound, "Hey, check out my web site!" The hound asked for the address and the dalmation responded, "www.dalmation.dot-dot-dot-dot-dot-dot-dot-dot.

A hound dog and a dalmation were sitting in an Internet cafe and thedalmation said to the hound, "Hey, check out my web site!" The hound askedfor the address and the dalmation responded,"www. dalmation. dot-dot-dot-dot-dot-dot-dot-dot.

Q: How do you know when your divorce is getting ugly?
A: When your lawyer doesn't seem like a bloodsucking leech anymore.
Q: What is the difference between a lawyer and a leech?
A: A leech will let go and drop off when its victim dies.
Q: What is the difference between a lawyer and a dalmation?
A: A dalmation knows when to stop chasing the ambulance.
Q: What do slime molds have more of than lawyers?
A: Respect.
Q: What does molds, ooze, and lawyers have in common?
A: They're all slime.
Q: Why did the lawyer cross the road?
A: To get to the car accident on the other side.
Q: What are some of the requirements in becoming a lawyer?
A: You must be able to get muggers, rapists, and pope abusers off the hook, and must have at least one relative who works at IBM.
Q: What kind of lure must you use if you want to attract lawyers so as to shoot them?
A: You may use any as long as it yells every once in a while "I'm gonna more...