Caller Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    The Jackasses

    Hot 7 years ago

    This Story is true! For all of you who occasionally have a really bad day when you just need to take it out on someone: Don't take that bad day out on someone you know, take it out on someone you *don't* know! Now get this.
    I was sitting at my desk, when I remembered a phone call I had to make. I found the number and dialed it.
    A man answered nicely saying, "Hello?"
    I politely said, "This is Patrick Hanifin and could I please speak to Robin Carter?"
    Suddenly the phone was slammed down on me! I couldn't believe that anyone could be that rude. I tracked down Robin's correct number and called her. She had written the last two digits incorrectly. After I hung up with Robin, I spotted the wrong number still lying there on my desk. I decided to call it again.
    When the same person once more answered, I yelled, "You're a jackass!" and hung up.
    Next to his phone number I wrote the word "jackass," and put it in my desk more...

    Radio Caller

    Hot 7 years ago

    REAL STORY: A Cork Radio Station in Ireland, 96 FM, was running a competition to find contestants who could come up with words that were not found in any English Dictionary, yet could still be used in a sentence that would make logical sense. The prize was a trip to Bali for a week.
    The DJ, Neil, had many callers; the following two, needless to say, stood out:
    DJ: 96FM, what's your name?
    Caller: Hi, me name's Dave.
    DJ: Dave, what is your word?
    Caller: Goan: spelled G-O-A-N, pronounced 'go-an.'
    DJ: We are just checking that (pause) and you are correct, Dave, 'goan' is certainly a word not found in the English Dictionary. Now, for a trip for two to Bali, can you make a sentence using that word and at the same time making logical sense?
    Caller: "Goan fuck yourself!"
    At this point, the DJ cut the caller short and announced that there was no place for that sort of language on a family show.
    After many more unsuccessful calls, the DJ took the more...

    Anger Management

    Hot 4 years ago

    When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don''t take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don''t know.
    I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I''d forgotten to make. I found the number and dialed it. A man answered, saying "Hello."
    I politely said, "This is Chris. Could I please speak with Robyn Carter?"
    Suddenly a manic voice yelled out in my ear "Get the right f***ing number!" and the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn''t believe that anyone could be so rude. When I tracked down Robyn''s correct number to call her, I found
    that I had accidentally transposed the last two digits.
    After hanging up with her, I decided to call the' 'wrong'' number again. When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled "You''re an asshole!" and hung up. I wrote his number down with the word' 'asshole'' next to it, and put it in my desk more...

    A scene from the movie Ruthless People. It's been a while but I'll try to retell the scene for anyone who hasn't seen it before.
    Danny De Vito is in his office behind his desk and is being questioned by some geeky guy (I think a cop) sitting across from him. The phone rings and Danny answers...
    Danny: "Hello"
    Caller: "Is Debbie there"
    Danny: "Debbie? Who's this?"
    Caller: "Ralph"
    Danny: "Ralph, Debbie's here but can't talk to you right now 'cause she's got my dick in her mouth! Want me to have here call you back when she's done?"
    Caller: hangs up
    Danny (to the geeky cop who's eyeballs are popping out): "I love wrong numbers!"

    Jerks by Patrick Hanifin (Reproduced without permission from the Humor Archives)
    Now get this. I was sitting at my desk, when I remembered a phone call I had to make. I found
    the number and dialed it. A man answered nicely saying, "Hello?"
    I politely said, "This is Patrick Hanifin and could I please speak to Robin Carter?" Suddenly
    the phone was slammed down on me! I couldn't believe that anyone could be that rude.
    I tracked down Robin's correct number and called her. She had transposed the last two digits.
    After I hung up with Robin, I spotted the wrong number still lying there on my desk. I decided
    to call it again. When the same person once more answered, I yelled "You're a jerk!" and hung
    up.
    Next to his phone number I wrote the word "Jerk," and put it in my desk drawer. Every couple of
    weeks, when I was paying bills, or had a really bad day, I'd call him up. He'd answer, and then
    I'd more...

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