"Police in Oklahoma" joke
A man was driving through Oklahoma when he was pulled over by one of the local officers.
He man asked, "What did you stop me for?"
The officer replied, "You failed to stop at the stop sign."
The man answered, "I slowed down, didn't I?"
"Yes," the officer admitted.
"Well, slow down, stop, same thing." the man rebutted.
At that point the officer pulled his night stick out and started hitting the man over the head. "Now, tell me, do you want me to stop or slow down?"
What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.
Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!
1. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried. Ever.
2. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
3. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
4. The chief export of Chuck Norris is more...
Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
A: 45 lbs.
Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
A: 45 minutes
Mickey and Minnie are going to get a divorce and the Judge asks Mickey... So you say shes crazy?
He replies... NO, I SAID SHE IS FUCKING GOOFY!!