"3 aliens" joke
there is 3 aliens that come to earth;the first one goes to an opera and learns how to say mememe.The second alien goes to a restaraunt and learns how to say forks&knives forks&knives.The third one goes to a candyshop and learns how to say goody goody gum drops goody goody gum drops.
So the next day a cop says " there was a murder that happened and I would like to know if anyone of you murdered the boy" so the first alien says "mememe," so the cop says "what did you use to kill the person?" the second one says" forks & knives forks& knives" so the cop replies " you know your going to have to go to jail for this" the third alien says "goody goody gum drops goody goody gum drops!"
An old married couple were driving down the road one day when suddenly the woman punched her husband right in the face. He shouted, "what the hell was that for?". She replied, "That was for 50 years of the worst sex I ever had!" As they continued down the more...
Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!
A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, "Religion?" The man says, "Methodist." St. Peter looks down his list, and says, "Go to room 24, but be very quiet as you pass room 8."
Another man arrives at the gates of heaven. more...
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...
Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn’t Jesus’ birthday. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus’ birthday.