Wheat Jokes / Recent Jokes

A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he meets an Aussie farmer and gets talking.

The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says,"Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice at large!"

Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off his herd of cattle. The Texan immediately says,"We have longhorns that are at least twice as large as your cows."

The conversation has, meanwhile, almost died when the Texan sees a herd of kangaroos hopping through the field.

He asks,"And what are those?"

The Aussie replies with an incredulous look,"Don't you have any grasshoppers in Texas?"

there was a a blonde driving her corvette out in the middle of a wheat field looking for the mall and another blonde drives by and sees what she is doing and yells you are such a disgrace to me and all of the other blondes so if i could i would swim out there and slap you...

My friend, Ed Peterson, over at Wellsburg, Iowa, received a checkfor $1, 000. 00 from the government for not raising hogs. So I want togo into the "not raising hogs" business next year. What I want to know is, in your opinion, what is the best kind offarm not to raise hogs on and what is the best breed of hogs not toraise? I want to be sure that I approach this endeavor in keepingwith all governmental policies. I would prefer not to raiserazorbacks, but if that is not a good breed not to raise, then I wouldjust as gladly not raise Yorkshires or Durocs. As I see it, the hardest part of this program will be in keeping anaccurate inventory of how many hogs I haven't raised. My friend, Peterson, is very joyful about the future of thebusiness. He has been raising hogs for twenty years or so, and thebest he ever made on them was $442. 00 in 1968, until this year when hegot your check for $1, 000. 00 for not raising hogs. If I get $1, 000. 00 for not raising 50 hogs, will I get $2, more...

One day a Blonde and a Brunette were driving through the country.. The Brunette noticed a woman over in a field of wheat rowing in akayak. The Blonde then noticed also and the Brunette asked her "Why is she in aboat out in a field of wheat? There is a lake right down the road!"And the Blonde replied... "Want me to swim out and tell her?"

One day a Blonde and a Brunette were driving through the country..
The Brunette noticed a woman over in a field of wheat rowing in a
kayak.
The Blonde then noticed also and the Brunette asked her "Why is she in a
boat out in a field of wheat? There is a lake right down the road!"
And the Blonde replied... "Want me to swim out and tell her?"

One day a Blonde and a Brunette were driving through the country..The Brunette noticed a woman over in a field of wheat rowing in akayak.The Blonde then noticed also and the Brunette asked her "Why is she in aboat out in a field of wheat? There is a lake right down the road!"And the Blonde replied... "Want me to swim out and tell her?"

A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he meets an Aussie farmer and gets talking. The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says, "Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice as large". Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off his herd of cattle. The Texan immediately says, " We have longhorns that are at least twice as large as your cows". The conversation has, meanwhile, almost died when the Texan sees a herd of kangaroos hopping through the field. He asked, "And what are those"? The Aussie replies with an incredulous look, "Don't you have any grasshoppers in Texas"?