Telegram Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    Two sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they need to purchase a bull so that they can breed their own stock. Upon leaving, the brunette tells her sister, "When I get there, if I decide to buy the bull, I'll contact you to drive out after me and haul it home." The brunette arrives at the man's ranch, inspects the bull, and decides she wants to buy it. The man tells her that he will sell it for $599, no less. After buying him, she drives to the nearest town to send her sister a telegram to tell her the news. She walks into the telegraph office, and says, "I want to send a telegram to my sister telling her that I've bought a bull for our ranch. I need her to hitch the trailer to our pickup truck and drive out here so we can haul it home." The telegraph operator explains that he'll be glad to help her, then adds, more...

    Comfortable

    Hot 9 months ago

    A blonde and a brunette are running a ranch together in Louisiana. They decide they need a bull to mate with their cows to increase their herd. The brunette takes their life savings of $600 dollars and goes to Texas to buy a bull. She eventually meets with an old cowboy that will sell her a bull.
    "It's the only one I got for $599, take it or leave it."
    She buys the bull and goes to the local telegram office and says, "I'd like to send a telegram to my friend in Louisiana that says: Have found the stud bull for our ranch, bring the trailer."
    The man behind the counter tells her, "Telegrams to anywhere in the U.S. are $. 75 per word."
    She thinks about it for a moment and decides. "I'd like to send one word, please."
    "And what word would that be?" inquires the man.
    "Comfortable," replies the brunette.
    The man asks, "I'm sorry miss, but is your friend gonna understand this telegram?"
    The more...

    A blonde and a brunette decide to start a farm together. They add up their life savings into a total of $200.00.Then, the blonde decided to purchase a bull with it. The brunette agrees, and so the brunette leaves to go find the perfect bull. When she does she is to telegram the blonde and tell her to come get it.Finally, the brunette find the bull of her dreams. The farmer says he wants $200 for it. The brunette, thinking she can get a better deal, says no to his offer.The farmer says, "Alright then, I'll give you a great deal, how about $199.00?"The brunette accepts and buys the bull. She has $1.00 left for the telegram. The telegram guy says, "It's $1.00 per word." The brunette thinks about this and says,"Comfortable, write that.""Comfortable?" the guy questions."Yes, you see she reads slow."

    A blonde sends her sister to pick up a bull.
    She picks up the bull but now has no way to get home.So she goes to the post office to send out a telegram.
    cashier: can i help you
    Sister: yes, um.. how many words can i send with this much money?
    cashier: one word.
    (she thinks & thinks & thinks until she finds the perfect word)
    Sister:comfortable
    Cashier: why comfortable??
    Sister: my sisters a dumb blonde, she will read it slowly!!!
    (come-for-the-bull!!)

    A dog went to a telegram office, took out a blank form and wrote: "Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof."
    The clerk examined the paper and politely told the dog: "There are only nine words here. You could send another 'Woof' for the same price." The dog replied, "But that would make no sense at all."

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