Pig Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    SOW

    Hot 1 year ago

    SOW: Would you like a nice cake with three candles for your party? PIGLET: I'd rather have three cakes and one candle.

    Moon Mission

    Hot 1 year ago

    Moon MissionNASA is launching a rocket to the moon. On board there are two pigs and Kiki, a stunning blonde. When the rocket is outside the stratosphere, the first stage drops off. Contact is made: "Houston here, Pig 1, Pig 1, do you read us? Over." "Oink, oink, here Pig 1, read you loud and clear." "Pig 1, do you still know your instructions?" "Yes, when we get to the moon, I press the red button to initiate the moon landing. Over." "That's right. Over and out." They go on until the rocket separates its booster stage." Hello, Pig 2? Come in please." "Oink, oink, here Pig 2, read you loud and clear." "OK, Pig 2 do you remember your instructions?" "Yes, when we've landed on the moon and are ready to leave, I press on the green button to initiate the launch program." "That's right, Pig 2. Over and out." An hour later, when the rocket has achieved the correct speed the last stage drops off more...

    Q. What's a pig's favorite ballet?
    A. Swine Lake.

    We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find
    that: - quicksand can work slowly - boxing rings are square - and a guinea
    pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers
    write, but fingers don't fing... - grocers don't groce,- and hammers
    don't ham?

    There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor
    pine in pineapple.

    English muffins were not invented in England, nor French fries in France.

    Sweetmeats are candies... while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.

    If the plural of tooth is teeth... - why isn't the plural of booth beeth?


    One goose, 2 geese; so, one moose, 2. .. meese?

    One index, two indices?

    Is cheese the plural of choose?

    If it is he, his and him - Shouldn't it be she, shis and shim?

    If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?

    If a vegetarian eats vegetables, more...

    Why did the pig have ink all over his face? Because it came out of the pen.

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