Passport Jokes

An elderly gentleman of 83 arrived in Paris by plane. At the French customs desk, the man took a few minutes to locate his passport in his carry-on bag. "You have been to France before, monsieur?" the customs officer asked, sarcastically. The elderly gentleman admitted he had been to France previously. "Then you should know enough to have your passport ready." The American said, "The last time I was here, I didn`t have to show it." "Impossible. Americans always have to show your passports on arrival in France!" The American senior gave the Frenchman a long hard look. Then he quietly explained, "Well, when I came ashore at Omaha Beach on D-Day in 1944 to help liberate this country, I couldn`t find any Frenchmen to show it to."

An old lady had always wanted to travel abroad. Since she was getting on in years, she thought she would really like to do so while she was still able. Until now, she'd never even been out of the country, so she began by going in person to the Passport Office to obtain her first passport.

"You must take the loyalty oath first," responded the passport clerk. "Raise your right hand, please."

The old gal raised her right hand.

"Do you swear to defend the Constitution of the United States against all its enemies, domestic or foreign?" was the first question.

The little old lady's face paled and her voice trembled as she asked in a small voice, "Uhhh... all by myself???"

An old lady really wanted to visit England, the home of her ancestors, before she died. So she went to the Federal Office and asked for a passport.

"You must take the loyalty oath first," the passport clerk said. "Raise your right hand, please."

The old gal raised her right hand.

"Do you swear to defend the Constitution of the United States against all its enemies, domestic or foreign?"

The sweet old face paled and the voice trembled as she responded, "Well, I guess so, but.. . will I have help, or will I have to do it all by myself?"

The elderly American gentleman arrived in Paris by plane.
At French Customs, he fumbled for his passport.
“You have been to France before, monsieur? ” the customs officer asked sarcastically.
The old gent admitted that he had been to France previously.
“Zen, you should know enough to ’ave your passport ready for inspection. ”
The American said, “The last time I was in France, I didn’t have to show a passport. ”
Impossible, You Americans always have to show your passports on arrival in France!
The American senior gave the Frenchman a long hard look. Then he quietly explained. “Well, when I came ashore at Omaha Beach on D-day in ’44, I couldn’t find any Frenchmen to show it to. ”

Before she died, an elderly woman from the United States wanted to visit England, the home of her ancestors. She went to the Federal Office and asked for a passport. "You must first take the loyalty oath," the passport clerk said. "Raise your right hand, please." The senior citizen raised her right hand as the clerk asked, "Do you swear to defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, domestic or foreign?" The sweet old face paled and the voice trembled as she responded, "Well, I guess so, but. . . will I have help, or will I have to do it all by myself?"