Nymphomaniac Jokes

Mommy, mommy! What's a nymphomaniac? Shut up and help me get grandma off the doorknob!

The nymphomaniac said to her friend "I've got an odd problem -- every time I sneeze, I have a incredible orgasm."

Her friend asks "What are you doing about it?"

"Sniffing pepper" The Nympho replies

The other day some friends and I were discussing one of the few
recurrent philosophical topics that come up in our conversations:
society as a whole. It was taking its usual course; one of my friends
insisted that society was going to hell, the other was somewhat
neutral, and I thought that people were simply becoming more tolerant
of differences.
My first friend announced (again) that society was on a steady
down-hill road. "Everyone today," she said, "is either messed up in
the head, a druggie, or a nymphomaniac."
My other friend laughed and nodded. Never having heard the word
before, I puzzled over what' nymphomaniac' could mean.
Trying not to sound stupid, I swallowed my pride and asked, "What's
that?"
"A girl who's obsessed with sex," explained my second friend.
I paused for a moment, thinking. I then turned and asked them, "Then
what is a guy obsessed with more...

The woman seated herself in the psychiatrists office. "What seems to be the problem?" the doctor asked.
"Well, I, uh," she stammered. "I think I, uh, might be a nymphomaniac (a woman who likes to have sex very often, esp. with lots of different men)."
"I see," he said. "I can help you, but I must advise you that my fee is $80 an hour."
"That's not bad," she replied. "How much for all night?"

Q: What's the difference between a prostitute, a nymphomaniac, and a blonde?
A: The prostitute thinks, "Aren't you done yet?"
The nympho thinks, "Are you done already?"
The blonde thinks, "Beige... I think I'll paint the ceiling beige."