One day a man from Alabama comes to Georgia to get an education. He goes to the first professor he sees and says, “What can you teach me?”
Shocked, the professor answers, “Well, I can teach you about the power of reasoning.”
With a questioned look on his face, the man replied, “What’s that?”
“I’ll give you an example,” said the professor. “Do you have a weedeater?”
Although the question seemed strange, the man answered, “Yes, I do”
“Well, if you have a weedeater, then you must have a yard, do you have a yard?”
The man nods.
“Then, if you have a yard, I’ll bet you have a house.”
Again, the man agrees.
“Because you have a house, you must have a wife?”
Once more, the man nods.
“If you have a wife, you must be heterosexual, correct?”
The man again agrees. The man finishes up the full course and heads back to Alabama. When he comes across more...
Two rednecks decided they weren't going anywhere in life, and thought they should go to college to get ahead.
The first redneck went in to see the counselor, who told him to take Math, History, and Logic.
"What's Logic?" the first redneck asked. The professor answered by saying, "Let me give you an example. Do you own a weed eater?" "I sure do." said the first redneck.
"Then I can assume, using logic, that you have a yard," replied the professor.
"That's real good!" said the redneck.
The professor continued, "Logic will also tell me that since you have a yard, you also own a house."
Impressed, the redneck said, "Amazin!"
"And since you own a house, logic dictates that you have a wife," continued the professor.
"That's Betty Mae! This is incredible!" The redneck is obviously catching on.
"Finally, since you have a wife, logically I can assume that you are more...
There is a man who has three girlfriends, but he does not know which one to marry. So he decides to give each one $5,000 and see how each of them spends it.
The first one goes out and gets a total makeover with the money. She gets new clothes, a new hairdo, manicure, pedicure, the works, and tells the man, "I spent the money so I could look pretty for you because I love you so much."
The second one went out and bought new golf clubs, a CD player, a television, and a stereo and gives them all to the man. She says, "I bought these gifts for you with the money you gave me because I love you so much."
The third one takes the 5000 and invests it in the stock market, doubles her investment, returns the 5000 to the man and reinvests the rest. She says, "I am investing the rest of the money for our future because I love you so much."
The man thought long and hard about the way that each woman had used the money.
He then decided more...
The next generation embeddable scripting language for the web!
JehovaScript (JS) is a powerful language with many advantages over
current scripting systems. Its features include active alerts, a
miracle system and error-collection. Rather than being defined as
DOM-compliant, object-oriented or nth-generation, JS is
Buzzword-Compliant, so your place at the forefront of technology is
guaranteed regardless of trend-changes in the world of computing.
Each run of a JS program is entitled to three miracles. This allows
you to deal gracefully with unexpected problems: you can create the
needed RAM if memory allocation fails, or temporarily change the
user's browser if the current browser does not support a certain
feature of the language.
Rather than create specialized logic for different situations, you can
change the interpreters beliefs about constants. For example, the more...
Natalie Cole, in response to Amy Winehouse's multiple Grammy win, said that Ms. Winehouse shouldn't have won due to her recent struggle with drugs. "...you don't get to just do your drugs and go onstage and get rewarded." If the Grammy voters based their vote on what Ms. Cole’s logic and only gave awards to musicians who never did drugs, Pat Boone would have swept every category from 1955… and that ain’t right.