Leather Jokes / Recent Jokes

Caution Golfers Crossing
Sun Shine City
Toy Boat
Unique New York
Mixed Biscuits
Red Leather, Yellow Leather
Ship Shape Shitheads

A guy waiting at the bus stop wearing chains, leather jaket, and leather pants and his hair in long spikes each a different color. An old man at the bus stop looked and looked at the guy, finally, the guy said to the old man: "havent you ever done anything crazy and wild in your life" and the old man said "yah, I have, I once made it with a peacock and I was wondering if your my son"

Some years ago, the now-defunct airline Braniff advertised their business class section with leather seats and more leg room with the following: 'Fly in leather with three more inches.' Spanish for 'in leather' is 'en cuero'. However, 'en cueros' means 'naked'. The Spanish version of Braniff's slogan thus became: 'Fly naked with three more inches.' What a manly airline...

An extremely red-faced man stormed into the tiny shop on the corner of Lingot and Main. Pushing his way past the assorted browsers, he bore down on the sales counter like a Scud missile. The lone clerk regarded him with some trepidation.

"I want to speak to the manager," he demanded.

"I'm sorry Sir, Mr. Mowbray isn't in today. Is there anything I can help you with?"

"You're damn right there is," he sputtered, his anger gushing out like urine in a pub. He reached into his pants pocket, extracted a tattered wallet and slammed it down on the counter. "I bought this piece of shit here only two months ago and now look at it. It's falling apart. Forty-nine ninety-five it cost me! Forty-nine ninety-five," he added for more emphasis. "Can you believe that?" His face was getting redder.

The clerk wasn't sure what to say to him. She only hoped the top of his head stayed put. She picked up the wallet more...

A new Filipino immigrant was talking with a Canadian and he noticed that the Canadian had a wind burnt lip. So the Filipino asked the Canadian... "Hey buddy, it's beri cold eh? Even your lips is changing leather."

A short story...
In Ohio, an unidentified man in his late twenties walked into a police station with a 9-inch wire protruding from his forehead and calmly asked officers to give him an X-ray to help him find his brain, which he claimed had been stolen. Police were shocked to learn that the man had drilled a 6-inch deep hole in his skull with a Black Decker power drill and had stuck the wire in to try and find the missing brain.
Dumb Ohio Laws
# In Ohio, if you ignore an orator on Decoration day to such an extent as to publicly play croquet or pitch horseshoes within one mile of the speaker`s stand, you can be fined $25. 00.
# Women are prohibited from wearing patent leather shoes in public.
# It is illegal to fish for whales on Sunday.
# It is illegal to get a fish drunk.
# The Ohio driver`s education manual states that you must honk the horn whenever you pass another car.
# Participating or conducting a duel is prohibited.
# Breast feeding more...

One day a blonde walks into a car shop. She looks around to see if she can find the perfect car for herself.
She finds a beautiful car with fine leather, but as she bends over to feel it she lets out a fart!
She looks around to see if anyone noticed, but as she turns she sees the sales guy is behind her so she askes him "How much is this car"
He replies back "Miss, If you farted just by touching the leather you're going to shit yourself when hear the price!"