Groundhog Day Jokes
11. It's on nearly every calendar.
10. Helps relieve cabin fever.
9. Spring or not, it's six weeks till St Urho's Day.
8. Forecast is no less reliable than the National Weather Service.
7. At least one of them critters is bound to see things your way.
6. Valentine's Day is too depressing for nerds.
5. Unlike the Easter bunny, he keeps his dirty paws outside.
4. As they used to say on radio: "The Shadow knows".
3. It's fun to say "Punxsutawney".
2. If a rodent can bring us an early spring, more power to him.
1. In Minnesota, either way we come out ahead.
On Groundhog Day what does it mean if the groundhog sees a stupid monster?
You'll have six more weeks of stupidity!
What would you get if you crossed February 2 with a puppy?
Over breakfast one morning, a woman said to her husband, "I'll bet you don't know what day this is?"
"Of course I do," he answered as if he was offended, and left for
The doorbell rang at 10 a. m., and when the wife opened the door, she was handed a box of a dozen long stemmed red roses. At 1: 00 p. m., a foil-wrapped, two-pound box of her favorite chocolates was delivered.
Later, a boutique delivered a designer dress. The woman couldn't wait for her husband to come home.
"First the flowers, then the chocolates and then the dress!" she exclaimed.
"I've never had a more wonderful Groundhog Day in my life!"
Q: On Groundhog Day, what does it mean if Punxsutawney Phil
comes out and sees the village idiot?
A: Within 6 weeks you'll have a village full of idiots.
Q: What happened when the groundhog met the dogcatcher?
A: He became a pound hog!
Q: What do you get when you cross a groundhog with a pistachio?
A: A green beast who predicts a dry spring, and acts like a nut.