Groundhog Jokes

  • Funny Jokes

    I bet you don't know what day this is, said the wife toher husband as he made his way out the front door. The husband was perplexed, but was always a quick thinker:"Of course I do, my dear. How could I forget!?" With that, he turned and rushed to catch the bus for work. At 10 AM, the doorbell rang and when the woman opened thedoor, she was handed a box containing a dozen long stemmedred roses. At 1 PM, a foil wrapped, two pound box of her favoritechocolates arrived. Later, a boutique delivered a designerdress. The woman couldn't wait for her husband to come home. The husband was smug when he returned from work, satisfiedthat he had recovered what could have been a very badsituation. His wife was indeed surprised: "First the flowers, then thechocolates and then the dress!" she exclaimed, "I've neverhad a more wonderful Groundhog Day in my life!"

    New York Mayor Bloomberg was bit yesterday by weather-forecasting groundhog Staten Island Chuck. When the attending physician was asked if there should be concern about infection, he replied, "No, Chuck will be fine."

    Q: What do you get when you crossbreed U. football and a groundhog?
    A: Six more weeks of bad football!

    Over breakfast one morning, a woman said to her husband, "I'll bet you don't know what day this is?"
    "Of course I do," he answered as if he was offended, and left for
    the office.
    The doorbell rang at 10 a. m., and when the wife opened the door, she was handed a box of a dozen long stemmed red roses. At 1: 00 p. m., a foil-wrapped, two-pound box of her favorite chocolates was delivered.

    Later, a boutique delivered a designer dress. The woman couldn't wait for her husband to come home.
    "First the flowers, then the chocolates and then the dress!" she exclaimed.
    "I've never had a more wonderful Groundhog Day in my life!"

    Q: What happens if the ground log sees its shadow?
    A: We'll have six more weeks of splinters!

    Q: Why was the groundhog depressed about his den?
    A: He was having a bad lair day!

    Q: What would you get if you crossed February 2 with a Christmas drink?
    A: Ground Nog Day!

    Q: What's green, has four legs, and jumps out of its hole on February 2?
    A: The ground frog!

  • Recent Activity