Creek Jokes / Recent Jokes

A man from Lahore was touring Punjab and got lost. He saw Santa working in his field and stopped for directions.
Santa told him how to get to Shimla.
The man wanted to talk a bit so he asked Santa, "Is this your farm?"
"Yep", Santa answered.
"How big is it?" asked the tourist.
"Well, it starts down the road there where the creek is and follows the creek up and over the hill to about where you can see that big tree. Then it runs across back of the barn to a big pile of stones up yonder and then down along the fence there to the road up that way."
The tourist smiled and said, "Well, that`s a nice place. Let me tell you about my place out in Lahore. I can get into my car and start out from one end of my property just as the sun is coming up in the east. I can drive all-day and just as the sun is setting in the west I reach to other end of my ranch. What do you think of that?"
Santa thought for a second more...

One day three poor men needed a place to sleep so they went to this farmers house the farmer said you can only sleep here if you dont steal my gold. when every one went to sleep the first guy went into the the room there was a creek then the farmer said whos that then the guy said meyow. oh its the cat. then the second guy went in there but there was this loud creek the fartmer said whos that then the guy said meyow. oh its the cat then the third guy went there but the creek went again then the farmer said whos there then the guy said its the cat

One day a boy came walking home from school. On the way home he saw a creek. He quickly jumped in, clothes and all. When he arrived home completely soaked his dad asked, "Son what happened?" "I jumped in that creek down the road." "Why did you do that?" "I dunno." His dad was very angry and said, "If you jump in that creek again, just because, I'm gonna tan that hide - just because! Is that clear?" "Yes dad." replies his son. The next day, the boy came home walking from school, and sure enough when he saw that creek, he jumped right on in. When he went home, his dad knew what had happened and asked, "Didn't I tell you not to jump in that creek again?" "Yes dad, but Satan told me to do it!"His dad, being somewhat religous, decided to give his son the benefit of the doubt and tells him - "Next time Satan tells you to do something like that, say' Satan get thee behind me in the name of Jesus'." more...

A man from Lahore was touring Punjab and got lost. He saw Santa working in his field and stopped for directions.
Santa told him how to get to Shimla.
The man wanted to talk a bit so he asked Santa, "Is this your farm?"
"Yep", Santa answered.
"How big is it?" asked the tourist.
"Well, it starts down the road there where the creek is and follows the creek up and over the hill to about where you can see that big tree. Then it runs across back of the barn to a big pile of stones up yonder and then down along the fence there to the road up that way."
The tourist smiled and said, "Well, that's a nice place. Let me tell you about my place out in Lahore. I can get into my car and start out from one end of my property just as the sun is coming up in the east. I can drive all-day and just as the sun is setting in the west I reach to other end of my ranch. What do you think of that?"
Santa thought for a second or two, more...

These are names of real towns in the US:
Aromatic Creek, MO
Go to Hell Gulch, SD
Caress, WV
Flirtation, CO
Kiss Me Quick, SD
Benign Peak, AK
Bellicose Peak, AK
Deception Creek, AR
Delusion Lake, WY
Another River, AK
Peculiar, MO
Yum Yum, TN
Climax, OR
Ding Dong, TX
Do Stop, KY
Goon Dip Mountain, AK
from "The Game of Words" by W.R. Espy

Once there was a little boy called Rohit who lived in the country.
They had to use an outhouse, and Rohit hated it because it was hot in the summer, cold in the winter and stank all the time.
The outhouse was sitting on the bank of a creek and the boy determined that one day he would push that outhouse into the river.
One day after a spring rain, the creek was swollen so Rohit decided today was the day to push the outhouse into the river.
So he got a large stick and started pushing.
Finally, the outhouse toppled into the river and floated away.
That night his dad Kanjibhai told him they were going to the woodshed after supper.
Knowing that meant a spanking, the little boy asked why.
Kanjibhai replied, "someone pushed the outhouse into the river today. It was you, wasn't it, son?"
Rohit answered yes.
Then he thought a moment and said,
"Dad, I read in school today that Gandhiji chopped down a Pipal tree and didn't get more...

When I was visiting a friend who lived on the edge of a wilderness preserve, we drove along a rutted trail, and we saw a small creek ahead whose bridge was under water.
"We have a serious beaver problem," our friend said. "They build dams that cause the creek to flood. Forest rangers take down the dams, and the beavers rebuild them."
As we got closer, we could see a large scoreboard posted by the bridge.
It read: BEAVERS 3 RANGERS 0