Bingo Jokes / Recent Jokes
Knock Knock Who's there! Bingo! Bingo who? Bingo'ng to come and see you for ages!
Bullshit Bingo
Do you keep falling asleep in meetings and seminars? What about those long and boring conference calls? Here is a way to change all of that!
How to play: Check off each block when you hear these words during a meeting, seminar, or phone call. When you get five blocks horizontally, vertically, or diagonally, stand up and shout, "BULLSHIT!!!"
Synergy
Strategic Fit
Gap Analysis
Best Practice
Bottom Line
Revisit
Bandwidth
Hardball
Out of the Loop
Benchmark
Value-Added
Proactive
Win-Win
Think Outside the Box
Fast Track
Result-Driven
Empower [or] Empowerment
Knowledge Base
Total Quality [or] Quality Driven
Touch Base
Mindset
Client Focus[ed]
Ball Park
Game Plan
Leverage
Testimonials from satisfied players:
"I had only been in the meeting for five minutes whenI more...
One night Aggie says to George "Think I'll go to bingo the night
George... when I'm gone you make sure the youngsters get in and
go to bed"
Now George and Aggie had thirteen kids the last time they counted.
So when Aggie went off to bingo, George went out and made the
youngsters come in and get to bed. For about three or four hours,
one little boy kept crying and crying, so George takes off up
with a split and hits the floor, the little boy cries harder and
harder.
George sputters out "What are you bawling about?"
The little boy replies "I want to go to me own home."
Dear Ann Landers: So you like "crazy lawsuits?" In the three years I have been writing the Random Nuts column for Graffiti magazine, I've collected some doozies and am pleased to pass some of the best along to you. Here they are:* After he threatened to sue McDonald's for $5 million, a former research scientist was arrested for extortion. The scientist claimed he ate part of a fried rat tail he found in a bag of Happy Meal french fries, but a grand jury said the tail came from one of his own laboratory rats.* A convict wants $1,000 because the state of New York made him eat "vegetable diet loaf" as a punishment for violating prison rules.* Another prisoner is suing because he says secondhand smoke from other inmates is ruining his health, though he smokes himself.* The all-time Random Nuts champ has to be a convicted Brooklyn burglar who is suing the state for $989 billion because prison guards beat up his jacket, which he wasn't wearing at the time.* In Boston, more...
How do you play Iraqi bingo? F18... B52... F18Sent by Onky
The wife comes home from a night at bingo with a new fur coat. She says "Honey, look what I won at bingo". Next week she comes home from bingo with a large diamond ring. She says,"Honey look what I won at bingo". Next week she come home from bingo driving a new porsche, she says "Honey, look what I won at bingo". The next week as she is preparing to get ready for bingo, the husband asks - "Honey shall I draw you a bath?" To which she replies "Why sure". As the wife enters the tub she notices there is less than a inch of water in the tub. She asks "how am I supposed to take a bath in this amount of water?" To which the husband replies..."I wouldn't want you to get your bingo card wet"!