Anon Jokes

Programmers Sayings...
''BASIC - A programming language. Related to certain social diseases in that those who have it will not admit it in polite company.'' - Anon.
''I speak BASIC to clients, 1-2-3 to management, and mumble to myself.'' - Anon.
''If you're masochistic enough to program in ADA, we're not going to stop you.'' - Matt Welsh
''Don't get suckered in by the comments... they can terribly be misleading.'' - Dave Storer
''If we can dispel the delusion that learning about computers should be an activity of fiddling with array indexes and worrying whether X is an integer or a real number, we can begin to focus on programming as a source of ideas.'' - Harold Abelson
''Optimization hinders evolution.'' - Anon.
''Programming graphics in X is like finding the square root of PI using Roman numerals.'' - Henry Spencer
''The best book on programming for the layman is Alice in Wonderland; but that's because it's the best book on anything for layman.'' - more...

''Usenet is like Tetris for people who still know how to read.'' - Computer Museum (Boston)
''Usenet isn't a right. It's a right, a left, and a swift uppercut to the jaw.'' - Computer Museum (Boston)
''If you put a billion monkeys in front of a billion typewriters typing at random, they would reproduce the entire collected works of Usenet in about... five minutes.'' - Anon.
''Come to think of it, there are already a million monkeys on a million typewriters, and the Usenet is NOTHING like Shakespeare!'' - Blair Houghton
''The NeXT Computer: The hardware makes it a PC, the software makes it a workstation, the unit sales makes it a mainframe.'' - Anon.
''What goes up must come down. Ask any system administrator.'' - Anon.
''Who's General Failure and why's he reading my disk?'' - Anon.
''If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get one million miles to the gallon, and explode once a year, more...