75th Jokes

Playgirl Rejection LetterNovember 30, 1995PLAYGIRL, INC. Dear Mrs. Smith, We wish to thank you for your letter and the polaroid pictureof your husband. We agree that his appearance in our March issue asthe Playgirl's "Man of the Month" centerfold would have been a truly fitting way for you to honor your 75th anniversary of wedded bliss, and as a life-time memento on his birthday. We submitted the picture to our various panels of judges, asit is our routine procedure, with the following results: When rated by our panel of average American women (ages 25 to40) on a scale from 1 to 10 (10 being the highest), his body was rateda -2. To further justify our ratings, we submitted your photographto another panel of women in the age bracket of 45 to 100. We couldn'tget them to stop laughing long enough to take the time to rate him. The old American women panel, aged 70 to 100, widowed for over twenty years, said "We'll retain our widowed status!" The Organization of Nude more...

An elderly couple is sharing an intimate dinner in honor of their 75th
wedding anniversary.
The man says softly, "Dear, there is something I must ask you. It has
always bothered me that our sixth child never quite looked like the
rest of our children. Now, let me assure you these 75 years have been
the most wonderful I could have hoped for, and your answer will not
take all that away. But, please tell me, did he have a different
father?"
His wife lowers her eyes, pauses for a moment, and then confesses,
"Yes. Yes, he did."
The old man tightens, very shaken, the reality hitting him hard. "Who?
Who was he? Who was the father?" he asks.
Again, the woman lowers her head, trying to muster the courage to
finally tell her husband the truth.
She says, "You."

Playgirl Rejection LetterNovember 30, 1995PLAYGIRL, INC.Dear Mrs. Smith, We wish to thank you for your letter and the polaroid pictureof your husband. We agree that his appearance in our March issue asthe Playgirl's "Man of the Month" centerfold would have been a truly fitting way for you to honor your 75th anniversary of wedded bliss, and as a life-time memento on his birthday. We submitted the picture to our various panels of judges, asit is our routine procedure, with the following results: When rated by our panel of average American women (ages 25 to40) on a scale from 1 to 10 (10 being the highest), his body was rateda -2. To further justify our ratings, we submitted your photographto another panel of women in the age bracket of 45 to 100. We couldn'tget them to stop laughing long enough to take the time to rate him. The old American women panel, aged 70 to 100, widowed for over twenty years, said "We'll retain our widowed status!" The Organization of Nude more...