"What's A Kiss?" joke

Humour: What's A Kiss?
Everything you wanted to know about a kiss; -
Definition of A Kiss:

Professors of different subjects define the same word different
ways.
Prof. of Algebra: Kiss is two divided by nothing.
Prof. of Geometry: Kiss is the shortest distance between two
straight lines.
Prof. of Physics: Kiss is the contraction of mouth due to the
expansion of the heart.
Prof. of Chemistry: Kiss is the reaction of the interaction
between two hearts.
Prof. of Zoology: Kiss is the interchange of unisexual salivary
bacteria.
Prof. of Physiology: Kiss is the juxtaposition of two orbicularis
oris muscles in the state of contraction.
Prof. of Dentistry: Kiss is infectious and antiseptic.
Prof. of Accountancy: Kiss is a credit because it is profitable when
returned.
Prof. of Economics: Kiss is that thing for which the demand is
higher than the supply.
Prof. of Statistics: Kiss is an event whose probability depends on
the vital statistics of 36-24-36
Prof. of Philosophy: Kiss is the persecution for the child, ecstasy
for the youth and homage for the old.
Prof. of English: Kiss is a noun that is used as a conjunction;
it is more common than proper; it is spoken in
the plural and it is applicable to all
Prof. of Engineering What is a Kiss?
"A Kiss is that you cannot give without taking, and cannot
take without giving. It is a course of procedure cunningly
devised for the mutual stoppage of speech for a moment when words
are superfluous. It is lip-service to love and the anatomical
juxtaposition of two orbicularis oris muscles in a state of
contraction.
A Kiss is a peculiar proposition. Of no use to one, yet
absolute bliss to two. The small boy gets it for nothing, the young
man has to steal it, and the old man has to buy it. It is the
baby's right, the lover's privilege, and the hypocrite's mask. To
young girl, faith; married woman, hope; old maid, charity. A Kiss
can be a comma, quotation mark or an exclamation point. It is also
a pleasant reminder that two heads are better than one."
A Kiss that speaks volumes is seldom a first edition.
Kissing a pretty girl is like opening a bottle of olives. After
the first one the rest come easy.
"Am I the first girl you ever Kissed? "
"Might be -- your face looks familiar."
----------------------------

In a crowded city at a crowded bus stop, a beautiful blonde was waiting for the bus. She was decked out in a tight leather mini skirt with matching tight leather boots and jacket. As the bus rolled up and it became her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too more...

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Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
A: 45 lbs.
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Two newfies walked into a pet store. The first says "I want four budgies." Salesman-certainly sir, would you like two male and two female or all male or all female? Newfie-I don't care. I just want 4 budgies! Salesman-certainly sir, what color would you like? We have more...

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Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!

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Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock Knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock Knock.
Who's more...

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