"I'm so ugly" joke
I'm so ugly. My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet.
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
My wife says I never listen... or something like that...
If sex is a pain in the ass, then you're doing it wrong...
Why did the Jews' house get destroyed by termites ?
They did not call the exterminators!
3 girls died and were brought to the gates of heaven. Upon entering the gate, they were halted by St. Peter and his obedient angel.
St. Peter asked the girls, "Before entering you must answer this simple question."
"Which is...?", they replied in more...