"I'm so ugly" joke
I'm so ugly. My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet.
Q: Why do men name their penises?
A: Because they don't like the idea of having a stranger make 99% of their decisions.
Three couples went to a resturant. The women wanted to compliment the men with something that was on the table.
"Could you pass me the sugar, sugar?" said the first gal.
"Could you pass me the honey, honey?" said the second.
"Could you more...
A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain.
A duck walks into a general store and asks the manager:
- "Got any fresh fruit?"
- "Got any fresh vegetables?"
- "No. We have only canned and dry goods."
The next day, the duck returns:
- "Got any fresh more...
Sanity is nice to visit but I wouldn't want to live there.