"I'm so ugly" joke
I'm so ugly. My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet.
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
I chased a girl for two years only to discover that her tastes were exactly like mine: We were both crazy about girls.
Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!
Have you ever noticed that the lawyer always smiles more than the client?
A guy is going on a tour of a factory that produces various latex products. At the first stop, he is shown the machine that manufactures baby-bottle nipples. The machine makes a loud' hiss-pop' noise.' The hiss is the rubber being injected into the mold,' explains the guide.' more...