"I'm so ugly" joke
I'm so ugly. My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet.
I don't believe in reincarnation, which is strange, because in a previous existence, I did.
Dentist: Just let me finish and you will be another man after these cosmetic procedures. Patient: Okay doc, but don't forget to send your bill to the other man.
A man went to his dentist because he has a strange feeling in his mouth. The dentist examines him and says, "That new upper plate I put in for you six months ago is eroding. What have you been eating?"
The man replies, "All I can think of is that about four more...
What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.