"I'm so ugly" joke
I'm so ugly. My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet.
A couple of women were playing golf one sunny Saturday morning. The first of the twosome teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.
Indeed, the ball hit one of the men, and he immediately clasped his hands more...
I would have e-mailed you sooner, but my cat ate my mouse.
Q: What's the worst trick you can do to your blind brother?
A: Leave the plunger in the toilet
Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!