"Confucious say" joke

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.

The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...

A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...

Ya mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the door.

You mamma is soo fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out!

Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!