"A very attractive lady goes up to a bar" joke

Hot 1 year agoby Tats

A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full beard.

"Are you the manager?" she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands. "Actually, no," the man replies.

"Can you get him for me? I need to speak to him," she says, running her hands beyond his beard and into his hair.

"Can't," breathes the bartender. "He's not here. Is there anything I can do?"

"Yes, there is. I need you to give him a message," she continues, running her forefinger across the bartender's lips and slyly popping a couple of her fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently.

"What should I tell him?" the bartender manages to say.

"Tell him," she whispers, "there is no toilet paper, hand soap, or paper towels in the ladies room."

After watching sales falling off for three straight months at Kentucky Fried Chicken, the Colonel calls up the Pope and asks for a favor.
The Pope says, ''What can I do?''
The Colonel says, ''I need you to change the daily prayer from, 'Give us this day our daily bread' more...

Confucius Says: It take many nails to build crib but one screw to fill it.

all we need to do is put a flashlight to your hairline then we will get the batmat symbol

Ol' Fred had been a faithful Christian and was in the hospital, near death. The family called their preacher to stand with them.

As the preacher stood next to the bed, Ol' Fred's condition appeared to deteriorate and he motioned frantically for something to write more...

Knock, knock
Who's there?
Did you ever hear the joke about the broken pencil?
Did you ever hear the joke about the broken pencil who?
Nevermind, it's pointless.

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justice:your hairlines as strait as you and that's not that strait
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justice:your hairlines as strait as you and that's not that strait
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beetroot:No I do not get it!!!
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Sir Builds Alot:ROFL!! Awesome joke.. :D
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roasted:is god perfect when he made yo hairline never mind he still is he did not make you one
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Matthew:This is pretty weird
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Chris:Ur hairline is so ugly it spelles ur name
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mike:in yo mouth
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mike:in yo mouth
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mike:Deez nuts
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Funny Joke? 669 vote(s). 69% are positive. 62 comment(s).