"Concerned about the Newlyweds" joke
A newlywed couple were spending their honeymoon in a remote log cabin in the mountains. They had registered on Saturday and hadn't been seen for five days. The elderly woman who ran the resort got concerned about the welfare of the newlyweds, and sent her husband to check on them. The husband knocks on the door of the cabin, and a weak voice from inside answers.
The old man asks, "Are you young folks all right?"
"Yes, we're fine," the man answered. We're living on the fruits of love."
The old man replied, "I kinda figured that. Say...would you mind not throwing the peelings out the window? They're choking my ducks!"
Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!
One day a cucumber, pickle and a penis were having a conversation.
The Pickle says, "You know, my life really sucks. Whenever I get big fat and juicy they sprinkle seasonings on my and stick me in a jar.
The Cucumber says, "Yeah, you think that's bad? Whenever more...
A man staggers into an emergency room with two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat.
Naturally the doctor asks him what happened.
"Well, it was like this," said the man. "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife when she more...
FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: October 1, 2009
RE: Gala Christmas Party
I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23rd, starting at noon in the private function room more...
A priest, a minister, and a rabbi want to see who’s best at his job. So they each go into the woods, find a bear, and attempt to convert it. Later they get together. The priest begins: "When I found the bear, I read to him from the Catechism and sprinkled him with holy more...