Roman Jokes / Recent Jokes

The U.S. Standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5 inches. That's an exceedingly odd number. Why was that gauge used? Because that's the way they built them in England, and the U.S. railroads were built by English expatriates.
Why did the English people build them like that? Because the first rail lines were built by the same people who built the pre-railroad tramways, and that's the gauge they used.
Why did ''they'' use that gauge then? Because the people who built the tramways used the same jigs and tools that they used for building wagons, which used that wheel spacing.
Okay! Why did the wagons use that odd wheel spacing? Well, if they tried to use any other spacing the wagons would break on some of the old, long distance roads, because that's the spacing of the old wheel ruts.
So who built these old rutted roads? The first long distance roads in Europe were built by Imperial Rome for the benefit of their legions. The roads have been used more...

This joke was told to me by a friend:
Jesus, hanging on the cross, says, "Peter, come here." Peter, thinking he is
about to receive a profound religious truth, tries goes to Jesus but Roman
soldiers push him back.
Again Jesus summons, "Peter, come here." Peter tries to, but Roman soldiers
again push him away.
Jesus summons a third time, "Peter come here." Peter gathers all of his
strength and finally breaks through. Bleeding from several lance wounds,
Peter says, "Yes, Master?"
Jesus looks upon Peter and says, "I can see your house from here!"

Why did the Roman Empire

Hot 2 years ago

Why did the Roman Empire collapse? What is the Latin for office automation?

Hi, I`m foreign. I`ve got Russian hands and Roman fingers.

BETHLEHEM -- It was rumored today that an unmarried couple from
Nazareth stopped in a manger owned by Alfredo Pinchi, a notorious
local slumlord, and a baby was born.

"There was no running water, and the place was filled with straw,"
commented local public health authorities. "We even found a
donkey inside!"

"The mother gave birth under extremely questionable circumstances,"
offered Pontius Pilate, Judean candidate for District Attorney.
"She claims to have been a virgin."

Unconfirmed reports indicate that Roman authorities are
investigating the baby on charges of sedition and treason. "There
are a bunch of people running around alleging that the baby is the
son of God," explained Pilate, "and that he will have some radical
ideas about religion in the future."

Three Kings from the Orient were caught on the outskirts of
Bethlehem more...

DCLXVI - Roman numeral of the Beast