Mission Impossible Jokes

What's this summer's hottest movie? Mission Impossible 3? Get real, not with that gay Tom Cruise fellow in the movie. Superman Returns? Blue tights, red bikini briefs, Kevin Spacey. Gay, gay, gay. Pirates of the Caribbean, Dead Man's Chest? What are you high? What's $784,000,000 gross worldwide when compared to Kim Jong-Il's masterpiece "Diary of a Student Girl". Written by Kim Jong-Il, directed by Kim Jong-Il, and staring as the student girl, Kim Jong-Il.
Critics in Pyongyang are calling it a masterpiece, playing to full houses every single day. Here's what some critics have said:
"Dairy of a Student Girl is great. Shoot me if I'm lying."
"Whoever doesn't see this movie is a traitor to the state. Seriously, if you don't see this movie, we'll kill you."
"I give this movie 4 stars. I would give it more, but our blessed leader has forbidden me to do so. He is as humble as he is talented."
"I would give it two thumbs up, more...

Knowing that I was a huge Mission Impossible fan, a friend sent me a voicemail yesterday informing me that Peter Graves has passed.
Thirty seconds later, the message self-destructed.