"Panda In A Bar" joke

Hot 2 years ago

A panda walks into a bar, sits down and orders a sandwich.
He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead.
As the panda stands up to go, the bartender shouts, "Hey, Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!"
The panda yells back at the bartender, "Hey man, I'm a Panda! Look it up!"
The bartender opens his dictionary and sees the following definition for panda: "A tree-dwelling marsupial of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves."

You're so ugly your mom has to tie a roast beef sandwich around your neck to get the dog to play with you.

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You mamma is soo fat she sat on a rainbow and skittles popped out!

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Sputnik:Punchline is a rapid fire: I got a fuck for duck, a duck for a fuck, a buck for a duck, and fucked up duck. The joke must fit this. This joke is also my proof of sobriety to my wife.
Funny Joke? 36 vote(s). 67% are positive. 1 comment(s).