"Computer Terms as defined by Rural Canadians" joke

Log On:Making the wood stove hotter.
Log Off:Don't add wood.
Monitor:Keep an eye on the wood stove.
Download:Getting the firewood off the pickup.
Mega Hertz:When you're not careful downloading (watch the toes!)
Floppy Disk:What you get from piling too much wood.
RAM:The hydraulic thingy that makes the woodsplitter work.
Hard Drive:Getting home in mud season.
Prompt:What you wish the mail was in mud season.
Windows:What to shut when it's 30 below.
Screen:What you need for black fly season.
Byte:What black flies do.
Chip:What to munch on.
Micro Chip:What's left in the bag when the chips are gone.
Infrared:Where the leftovers go when Fred's around.
Modem:What you did to the hay fields.
Dot Matrix:Farmer Matrix's wife.
Lap Top:Where little kids feel comfy.
Keyboard:Where you hang your keys.
Software:Plastic eating utensils.
Mouse:What eats the horses' grain in the barn.
Main Frame:The part of the barn that holds the roof up.
Port:Fancy wine.
Enter:C'mon in!
Random Access Memory:You can't remember how much that new rifle cost when your wife asks.