"Chocolate.. mmm!!!" joke
Woman in a restaurant: right, id like a scoop of strawberry icecream, a scoop of chocolate icecream, and a scoop of vanilla please!
Waiter: I'm sorry madam, it seems we have no choclate.
Woman: (sighs) then ill have a strawberry milkshake, vanilla milkshake and a chocolate milkshake please!
Waiter: I'm sorry we dont have any chocolate milkshake.
Woman: Fine. I'll have a strawberry shortcake, vanilla shortcake and a chocolate shortcake PLEASE!
Waiter: Madam, we have NO chocolate! tell me, please, is there the word 'van' in vanilla?
Woman: Yes, theres a 'van' in vanilla
Waiter: And, is the word straw in strawberry?
Woman: Yes, theres a 'straw' in strawberry.
Waiter: Is there a 'fuck' in choclate
Woman: Theres no 'fuck' in choclate
Waiter: THAT'S WHAT IV'E BEEN TRYING 2 TELL YOU!!!
An old married couple were driving down the road one day when suddenly the woman punched her husband right in the face. He shouted, "what the hell was that for?". She replied, "That was for 50 years of the worst sex I ever had!" As they continued down the more...
Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!
A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, "Religion?" The man says, "Methodist." St. Peter looks down his list, and says, "Go to room 24, but be very quiet as you pass room 8."
Another man arrives at the gates of heaven. more...
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...
Q:what did god say when the first black person came to heaven?
A:oops I must of burnt one!!