Stroke Jokes / Recent Jokes
Two lawyers, Jon and Bill, head out for their usual 9 holes of golf. Jon offers Bill a $50 bet. Bill agrees and they’re off.
They shoot a great game. After the 8th hole, Bill is ahead by one stroke, but cuts his ball into the rough on the 9th.
“Help me find my ball. Look over there, ” he says to Jon. After a few minutes, neither has any luck. Since a lost ball carries a four stroke penalty, Bill secretly pulls a ball from his pocket and tosses it to the ground.
“I’ve found my ball! ” he announces.
“After all of the years we’ve been partners and playing together, ” Jon says, “you’d cheat me out of a lousy 50 bucks? ”
“What do you mean, cheat? I found my ball sitting right there! ”
“And you’re a liar, too! ” Jon says. “I’ll have you know I’ve been STANDING on your ball for the last five minutes!
A blonde competed with a brunette and a redheaded woman in the Breast Stroke division of an English Channel swim competition.
The brunette came in first, the redhead second.
The blonde woman finally reached shore completely exhausted.
After being revived with blankets and coffee, she remarked, "I don't want to complain, but I think those other two girls used their arms."
Three nuns were sitting on a park bench one day. A flasher walked up and showed
them his stuff.
The first nun had a stroke.
The second nun had a stroke.
The third nun's arm was too short.
3 old ladies are sitting on a bench in the park, when a naked man runs up and jumps right in front of them.
The first old lady had a stroke.
The second old lady had a stroke.
But the third old lady's arm was too short.
One bright sunny day, a beautiful blonde girl was cruising the countryside in her new, shiny red sports car. Suddenly, she jammed on the brakes, and she brought the car to a sideways, screeching halt. She quickly jumped out of the car, and ran up the road a little way, to where she began fuming in anger. For there, about 40 feet in front of her, in the middle of the road, were two other beautiful young blondes, sitting in a rowboat. One was on the middle seat, straining her arms and pulling for all she was worth on a set of oars, while the other was in the bow of the boat shouting through a megaphone, "Stroke! Stroke!"So infuriated was the first blonde at these two and their foolishness, that she began pacing back forth on the pavement, throwing gravel and dirt at them from her place on the road, and she screamed at the top of her lungs, "You two are so stupid, and if I could swim, I'd come out there and kick both your behinds!!"
Three little old ladies, sitting on a park bench. The town flasher comes by and shows them his ALL! The first little old lady had a huge stroke. Thesecond little old lady had a little stroke. The third little old lady would have had astroke................ but her arms weren't quite long enough.
A Sardarni competed with a French woman and an English woman in the Breast Stroke division of an English Channel swim competition. The French woman came in first, the English woman second. The Sardarni finally reached shore completely exhausted. After being revived with blankets and coffee, she remarked, "I don't want to complain, but I think those other two girls used their arms."