Remover Jokes / Recent Jokes

A very distinguished lady was on a plane arriving from Switzerland. She found herself seated next to a nice priest, to whom she said, "Excuse me, Father, could I ask a favor?"
"Of course! What can I do for you?"
"Here's the problem... I bought myself a new sophisticated hair remover gadget for which I paid an enormous sum of money. I have really gone over the declaration limits and I am worried that they will confiscate it at customs. Do you think you could hide it under your cassock?"
"Of course I could, my child, but you must realize that I will not lie."
"You have such an honest face, Father, I am sure they will not ask you any questions," and she gave him the hair remover.
The aircraft arrived at its destination. When the priest presented himself to customs he was asked, "Father, do you have anything to declare?"
"From the top of my head to my sash, I have nothing to declare, my son," he more...

There was this guy at a baseball game, and he had to go to the bathroom really bad, but the men's bathroom was all filled up and he couldn't wait.
He looked over at the girl's bathroom and there wasn't a line, so he went in there, entered a stall and sat to go to the bathroom.
He saw 3 buttons. Curious, he pushed the first button and went "ah". He pushed the second button and went "ooo". Finally, when he pushed the third and woke up in the hospital he asked, "What happened?"
The doctor said, "Didn't you know that the third button is an automatic tampn remover?"

Moral: An old-man that cannot lie
A very distinguished lady was on a plane arriving from Switzerland.
She found herself seated next to a nice priest whom she asked: "Excuse
meFather, could I ask a favor?"
"Of course my child, What can I do for you?"
"Here is the problem, I bought myself a new sophisticated hair remover
for which I paid an enormous sum of money. I have really gone
over the declaration limits and I am worried that they will confiscate
it at customs. Do you think you could hide it under your cassock?"
"Of course I could, my child, but you must realize that I cannot lie."
"You have such an honest face Father, I am sure they will not ask you
any questions", and she gave him the' hair remover'.
The aircraft arrived at its destination. When the priest presented
himself to customs he was asked, "Father, do you have anything to
declare?
"From more...

The busy Park Avenue veterinarian impatiently assured the well-dressed lady with the schnauzer dog that there was nothing wrong with the animal's hearing. "There's just too much hair around the dog's ears," he said. "Get some hair remover and he'll be all right."
She purchased a bottle of depilatory at a nearby pharmacy, and the clerk instructed her to use it at full strength for leg hair and to dilute it by half for underarms. "Thanks," said the woman with a puzzled frown, "but I want to use this on my schnauzer."
"Oh," said the clerk, somewhat taken aback. "Well, in that case you'd best use it at one-third strength. . . and. . . uh, I wouldn't advise bike riding for a while!"

One day, an immigrant from Poland entered a New York City Police Precinct to report that his American wife was planning to kill him.
The police officer on duty was intrigued by this, and he asked, "How sure are you that she is gonna kill you? Did she threaten to kill you?"
"No," replied the nervous immigrant.
"Did you hear her tell someone else that she's gonna kill you?"
"No."
"Did someone tell you that your wife is gonna kill you?"
"No."
"Then why did you think she's gonna kill you?" asked the exasperated police officer.
"Because I found bottle on dresser and I think she gonna poison me!"
He handed the police officer the suspect bottle. The police officer took one look at the label on the bottle and started to laugh out loud.
The immigrant became indignant and said, "What so funny? Can't you see the label on bottle said 'Polish Remover'?"