"Proud To Be A Senior Citizen..." joke
Life of a Senior Citizen... I'm the life of the party... even when it lasts till 8 p. m. I'm very good at opening child-proof caps with a hammer. I'm usually interested in going home before I get to where I'm going. I'm good on a trip for at least an hour without my aspirin, beano, & antacid. I'm awake many hours before my body allows me to get up. I'm smiling all the time because I can't hear a word you are saying. I'm aware that other people's grandchildren are not as bright as mine. I'm so cared for: Long term care, Eye care, Private care, Dental care. . . I'm not grouchy, I just don't like traffic, waiting, crowds, children, politicians. I'm sure everything I can't find is in a secure place. I'm wrinkled, saggy and bumpy and that's just my left leg. I'm realizing that aging is not for sissies. I'm anti-everything now: Anti-fat, Anti-smoke, Anti-noise, Anti-inflammatoryI'm going to reveal what goes on behind closed doors. . . Absolutely nothing! I'm sure they are making adults much younger these days. I'm in the initial stage of my golden years: SS, CD's, IRA's, AARP.. . I'm wondering. . If you're only as old as you feel, how could I be alive at 150? I'm supporting all movements now. . . by eating bran, prunes and raisins. I'm a walking storeroom of facts. . . I've just lost the storeroom.
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