"Pregnant Lady" joke
One day a pregnant lady that was expecting triplets was walking through a gangster neighborhood, and was shot three times. When she went to the emergency room, the doctor said that she would live, but that the kids might experience complications as they got older.
Ten years later, the first kid came running down the stairs and said, "Mommy Mommy! Guess what? I pooped a bullet!"
A day or so later, the second kid came running down the stairs and said, "Mommy Mommy! Guess what? I pooped a bullet!"
The third kid come down the stairs and said, "Mommy Mommy! Guess what?"
She said, "Let me guess... You pooped a bullet?"
He said, "No, I was jacking off and I shot the dog."
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