"McDonnell Douglas Warranty Registration" joke
Please fill out and mail this card within 10 days of purchase
Thank you for purchasing a McDonnell Douglas military aircraft. In
order to protect your new investment, please take a few moments to
fill out the warranty registration card below. Answering the survey
questions is not required, but the information will help us to develop
new products that best meet your needs and desires.
Password, Code Name, Etc.
2. Which model aircraft did you purchase?
3. Date of purchase
Month Day Year
4. Serial Number
5. Please check where this product was purchased:
Received as Gift/Aid Package
Sleazy Arms Broker
6. Please check how you became aware of the McDonnell Douglas product you
have just purchased:
Heard loud noise, looked up
Recommended by friend/relative/ally
Political lobbying by Manufacturer
Was attacked by one
7. Please check the three (3) factors which most influenced your
decision to purchase this McDonnell Douglas product:
Recommended by salesperson
McDonnell Douglas Reputation
Advanced Weapons Systems
Negative experience opposing one in combat
8. Please check the location(s) where this product will be used:
Misc. Third-World Countries
9. Please check the products that you currently own, or intend to
purchase in the near future:
ProductOwnIntend to purchase
10. How would you describe yourself or your organization? Check all
Corrupt (Latin American)
11. How did you pay for your McDonnell Douglas product?
Suitcases of Cocaine
12. What is your occupation?
Occupation You Your spouse
13. To help us understand our Customers' lifestyles, please indicate
the interests and activities in which you and your spouse enjoy
participating on a regular basis:
Activity/Interest You Your Spouse
Default on Loans
Watching Sports on TV
Mutually Assured Destruction
Thanks for taking the time to fill out this questionnaire. Your
answers will be used in market studies that will help McDonnell
Douglas serve you better in the future - as well as allowing you to
receive mailings and special offers from other companies, governments,
extremist groups, and mysterious consortia.
Comments or suggestions about our fighter planes? Please write to:
McDONNELL DOUGLAS CORPORATION
Military Aerospace Division
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