Zoom Jokes

A man in Ireland is driving his Morris Miner to the ferry port to go home in England. Suddenly, his car breaks down. A bloke in a Ferrari pulls up and says he has a towrope in his boot, but he warns that he is a fast driver. So if he goes too fast, just flash your lights and beep your horn. They set off and suddenly the Ferrari driver spots a Porsche. He thinks "this is no good, I must overtake that Porsche." So he speeds up, the driver of the Porsche speeds up, until they are speeding like a man-on-fire!
The driver of the Morris miner starts flashing its lights and beeping its horn.
Meanwhile, Paddy, Mick and Ferges are standing on their driveway. Suddenly, ZOOM! Goes the Porsche. ZOOM! Goes the Ferrari. ZOOM! Goes the Morris Miner.
Paddy says' did you see that Porsche, it was going' at least a 100 miles an hour!'
Mick replies' yep, that was okay, but did you see that Ferrari, that was 110 miles an hour'
Ferges thinks, then says

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Zoom!
Zoom who?
Zoom did you expect!

Bill Gates was in India a few days ago.
He announced that Microsoft plans to release a windows2000
version in Hindi. Here are some Windows related terms
that may be used in the Hindi version of...
Windows 2000: Khirkiyan 2000

File - Phaail
Save - Bachao
Save as - Aise Bachao
Save All - Subko Bachao
Help - Mujhe Bachao
Select - Chuno
Select All - Sab Chuno
Find - Dhoondo
Find Again - Firse Dhoondo
Move - Hilao
Mail - Dak
Mailer - Dakiya
Zoom - Paas se dhekho
Zoom Out - Dhoor se dhekho
Open - Kholo
Close - Band Karo
New - Naya
Replace - Badli Karo
Run - Bhaago
Print - Chaapo
Print Preview - Dekh Ke Chaapo
Copy - Teepo
Cut - Kaato
Paste - Chipkao
Paste Special - Jayada Chipkao
Delete - Dho dalo
View - Nazaara
Tools - Auzaar
Toolbar - Auzaar ka dabba
Spreadsheet - Khuli Chaadar
Database - Bahi more...

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Zoom!
Zoom who?
Zoom did you expect!

Read all the definitions when you've time... some are very funny...
When Mr. Bill Gates of Microsoft came to Sri Lanka, he had Signed on an
agreement with Minister of posts and telecommunications Mangala Samaraweera
to release the Sihaleese Version of JANNEL 98 (WINDOWS' 98) by end of this
year 1999 Subsequently, they gave a demo on Sinhaleese Version of
WINDOWS'98 (SIN98) to the PRESS people.
The following interesting things (commands & messages) have been observed
from Sinhaleese Version of WINDOWS'98 demo.
File = Pile
Save = Beragannda
Save as = Mehama Beraganada
Save All = Okkoma Beraganada
Help = udhauv
Find = Hoyanda
Find Again = Ayith Hoyanda
Move = Aying venda
Mail = Thapal
Mailer = Piyum Mahaththaya
Zoom = loku koranda
Zoom Out = podi Karanda
Open = Arinda
Close = Whanda
New = aluuth
Old = Parana
Replace = Meka aran araka danada
Run = more...