Miami Heat Jokes

Melanie Griffith is taking heat for blowing smoke with her teenage offspring. Last week outside a Beverly Hills boutique, paparazzi snapped the actress, 48, cigarette dangling from her lips, lighting a nicotine stick for a young woman identified as her 16-year-old daughter, Dakota (dad is Don Johnson)........

I mean what is the big deal. Smoking cigarettes is cool, we all know that and this is just the beginning of her cool training. Her dad is Don Johnson for goodness sake. She has a lot of work to do, to live up to that amount of coolness. Next on the to-do list of cool.....rolling up your jacket sleeves to use a hand gun and singing duets with Barbra Streisand.....Get cracking Dakota!!

Former Miami Heat guard Tim Hardaway said yesterday on a radio show that he would not want to play on a team with a gay teammate.

Ironically, Tim is about to learn a lesson about bigotry, losing endorsement contracts, and adoring fans the Hard-a-way.

Miami baller Alonzo Mourning announced he may not retire after this year. Just what Florida needs: more old people who can't drive. Why not stick around? The team's doing great with him. How bad are the Miami Heat? In comparison, the Dolphins are now just mediocre.

Alonzo Mourning may return to the Miami Heat if he can get his body back in shape. If not, he'll go to the Knicks.