Ariel Jokes

"Hey, gimme a pencil, Tall fat bush!!" Shouts Ariel. "WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?!" Screams Mrs.godonfur. "I wasnt talking to you, I was talking to that tree there behind that has a sign on it saying, 'This amazing tree makes pencils, paper, rubber, and all sorts of things!'" Replies Ariel. "No, thats what the wood is from..." Giggles Mrs.godonfur.

Here are a selection of jokes from the Washington Post -- if you don't get' em, the * are explained at the bottom...

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JOKE 1

An American tourist in Italy is constipated for a week, but when he arrives in Florence, the water is better and his condition goes away. "With Firenze* like this," he said, "who needs enemas?"

JOKE 2

Dr. Smith: My son passed calculus* but he wasn't at all happy about it.
Dr. Jones: Why not?
Dr. Smith: It was the size of a pea!
Dr. Jones: Hahaha-ha.

JOKE 3

A young American woman is touring Germany. She is walking down the street when a sleazy guy jumps out of an alley and opens his raincoat. "Ewww," she shrieks. "That's gross." "Danke schoen," he says.

JOKE 4

Did you hear about the incompetent Hawaiian vulcanologist? He didn't know his a'a's* from a hole in the more...

Friends and Enemies
Ariel was in trouble again. Her sisters were complaining to King Neptune that she didn't want to dress properly.
Instead of wearing anemones to cover the protruding bits, she would stick long fronds of seaweed in her hair. Obviously these fronds did not always do their job because they tend to move with the flow, and this really annoyed her sisters.
King Neptune, being a strict father, admonished his daughter and insisted she discards the seaweed and wear her anemones like a dutiful daughter should.
"But father," Ariel argued, "with fronds like these, who needs anemones?"

Ariel was in trouble again. Her sisters were complaining to King Neptune that she didn't want to dress properly.
Instead of wearing anemones to cover the protruding bits, she would stick long fronds of seaweed in her hair. Obviously these fronds did not always do their job because they tend to move with the flow, and this really annoyed her sisters.
King Neptune, being a strict father, admonished his daughter and insisted she discards the seaweed and wear her anemones like a dutiful daughter should.
"But father," Ariel argued, "with fronds like these, who needs anemones?"

Ariel was in trouble again. Her sisters were complaining to King Neptune that she didn't want to dress properly. Instead of wearing anemones to cover the protruding bits, she would stick long fronds of seaweed in her hair. Obviously these fronds did not always do their job because they tend to move with the flow, and this really annoyed her sisters. King Neptune, being a strict father, admonished his daughter and insisted she discards the seaweed and wear her anemones like a dutiful daughter should." But father," Ariel argued, "with fronds like these, who needs anemones?"