"5 Quick Riddles" joke
Q: The guy whose job it is to spray water over the veggies at the grocery store develops an' attitude.' Why should he be charged as a petty criminal
A: Because of his mist demeanor - (Or' Because he was misty meaner.' or' He was Mr. meaner.) (By Gary Hallock)
Q: A writer scorned computers and used an old-fashioned machine on which to compose her less-than-literary compositions, which pandered to low taste but sold very well. What did she name the machine she wrote on
A: A tripewriter (or A tritewriter) (By SRpunster)
Q: What jazz singer did God use to create the world
A: Eartha Kitt (By Gary Hallock)
Q: What do you call a reptile hired to look into mutual fund and stock market fraud
A: An invest-a-gator (By Stan Kegel)
Q: What large extinct creature was probably named after the infected wounds of Victorian era female sibling authors
A: Bronte sores (By Gary Hallock)
Kermit the Frog gets sued
byKermit the Frog is getting sued by Miss Piggy for Sexual Harassment. She finally had enough of his greeting every time he called her on the phone: "Hi, Hoe - Kermit the Frog here..."
Dyslexic bank robbery
byTwo dyslexic bank robbers run into a bank shouting: "air in the hands mother stickers, this is a f*** up!"
A liberal came upon a genie and said, "You're a genie. Can you grant me three wishes?" The genie replied, "Yes, but only if you're feeling generous enough to share your good fortune." The liberal said, "I'm a liberal. I'm always happy to share." The more...
A couple of women were playing golf one sunny Saturday morning. The first of the twosome teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole.
Indeed, the ball hit one of the men, and he immediately clasped his hands more...