"Getting along in life.." joke

There are a few “secrets” to getting along in life, and here are some of the better ones: 1. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and will never achieve, its full potential, that word would be “meetings. ” 2. There is a very fine line between “hobby” and “mental illness. ” 3. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them. 4. And when God, who created the entire universe with all of its glories, decides to deliver a message to humanity, He will NOT use, as His messenger, person on cable TV with a bad hair style. 5. You should not confuse your career with your life. 7. No matter what happens, or what you say, or how you say it, somebody will find a way to take it too seriously. 8. When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual is crazy. 9. Nobody cares if you can’t dance well. Just get up and dance 10. Take out the fortune before you eat the cookie. 11. The most powerful force in the universe is gossip. 12. “The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.

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