"Collecting Snails" joke
A wife and her husband were having a dinner party for some important guests. The wife was very excited about this and wanted everything to be perfect. At the very last minute, she realized that she didn't have any snails for the dinner party, so she asked her husband to run down to the beach with the bucket to gather some snails.
Grudgingly, he agreed. Grabbing a bucket, he walked out the front door, down the steps and out to the beach. As he was collecting the snails, he spotted a beautiful woman walking alongside the water just a little further down the beach.
"Wouldn't it be great if she would even just come down and talk to me?" he kept thinking to himself as he continued collecting the snails.
Suddenly he looked up and the beautiful woman was standing right over him. They started talking and ended up going back to her place, where they spent the night together. He woke up very early the next morning and exclaimed, "Oh no! My wife's dinner party!"
He quickly got dressed, grabbed the bucket and raced out the door. He ran down the beach all the way to his apartment and up the stairs. He was in such a hurry that, as he reached the top of the stairs, he dropped the bucket of snails. There were snails all down the stairs.
Just then, the door opened with a very angry wife standing in the doorway wondering where he had been all this time.
He looked at the snails all down the stairs, looked at his wife, then back at the snails and said, "Come on guys, we're nearly there!"
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