Hypocrite Jokes

Teacher turns to her class and says "Today class, we are going to pick out some big words and use them in a sentence. Jenny would you like to go first?"
"Yes Ma'am. Hypocrite. That boy was a hypocrite. He said it was not OK to go outside and play. Then he went out to play"
"Very Good Jenny!"
Little Johnny jumps up in the back of the room waving his hands. "Yes Johnny" "I have a big one!" He exclaimed.
Sighing the teacher holds her hands together and prays silently, "Go ahead Johnny" she says.
"Harassment!" says Little Johnny, "Her mouth said no, but harassment yes!"

"My boyfriend is such a cheat and a liar!" Sue shouted. "I’ve been going with the guy for nearly a year now and not once did he mention that he’s married."
"Oh, that’s terrible," her friend said.
"Yeah. What a hypocrite! I’d probably never have found out. I heard purely by chance when it was mentioned the other day by my husband."