"Very Foreign Expressions" joke

Winners of a New York Magazine contest who were asked to take a well-known expression in a foreign language, change a single letter and provide a definition for the new expression
RESPONDEZ S'IL VOUS PLAID:
Honk if you're Scottish
HARLEZ-VOUS FRANCAIS?:
Can you drive a French motorcycle?
VENI, VIPI, VICI:
I came, I'm a very important person, I conquered.
COGITO EGGO SUM:
I think; therefore I am a waffle.
RIGOR MORRIS:
The cat is dead.
QUE SERA SERF:
Life is feudal.
LE ROI EST MORT. JIVE LE ROI:
The king is dead. No kidding.
POSH MORTEM:
Death styles of the rich and famous.
PRO BOZO PUBLICO:
Support your local clown.
MONAGE A TROIS:
I am three years old.
HASTE CUISINE:
Fast French food.
QUIP PRO QUO:
A fast retort.
ALOHA OY:
Love; greetings; farewell; from such a pain you should never know.
MAZEL TON:
Tons of luck.
VISA LA FRANCE:
Don't leave your chateau without it.
CARNE DIEM:
Seize the meat