"Attorney and Two Men" joke
An Attorney was riding home in his limo and noticed two men sitting on the side of the road eating grass, he told his driver to stop and investigate.
His driver went to the two men and asked, sirs why are you eating grass? The first man replied, I have no money and must eat grass. The driver told the Attorney. The attorney would not hear of it and said come to my house and I will feed you. The man stated, sir I have a wife and three children, and then the second man spoke up and said I have a wife and six children. The Attorney says it is ok bring them all, there is enough for everyone.
It takes about twenty minutes to get everyone into the car and they are on their way.Shortly after the two men are totally overtaken and are saying to the Attorney, sir I do not know how to thank you and we are not able to repay you, thank you for your kindness. The Attorney says to them do not worry about it, it is fine and plenty for everyone. You will love my house, the grass is about two feet high.
I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and
asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I
turned around and walked back out and never went back My husband didn't
say a word...
The Lone Ranger was ambushed and captured by an enemy Indian War Party.
The Indian Chief proclaims,
"So, YOU are the great Lone Ranger... In honor of the Harvest Festival, YOU will be executed in three days."
"Before I kill you, I more...
If electricity comes from electrons, does that mean that morality comes from morons?
all we need to do is put a flashlight to your hairline then we will get the batmat symbol
Q: Why do Scotsmen wear kilts?
A: Because sheep can hear the zipper.