"According to a recent survey" joke

Hot 1 year ago

According to a recent survey, men say the first thing they notice about a woman is their eyes, and women say the first thing they notice about men s they're a bunch of liars.

Lenin is dying, and talking things over with Stalin, his
successor.
"The one worry I have," says Lenin, "is this: will the people
follow you? What do you think, comrade Stalin?"
"They will," says Stalin, "they surely more...

- ridin' solo, I'm ridin' solo
- Nan please, we're at granddad's funeral

A blonde walks up to a Coke machine and puts in a coin. Out pops a coke.
The blonde looks amazed and runs away to get some more coins.
She returns and starts feeding the machine madly and, of course, the machine keeps feeding out drinks.
Another woman walks up behind more...

What is the difference between Northern and Southern racism?
A southern racist doesn't mind blacks living nearby, as long as they
don't get "uppity."
A northern racist doesn't mind blacks getting "uppity" as long as they
don't live close.

President Clinton and his wife are at the first baseball game of the season. At the start of the game the pitcher comes up in the stands and whispers something in Clinton's ear.
All of a sudden Clinton looks at Hillary and yells, "Okay, Hillary, GET OUT!".
She more...

Add a comment
remember me
follow replies
0
0
(0)
Mindy Matijasevic:hilarious!
Funny Joke? 48 vote(s). 77% are positive. 1 comment(s).