B^2 Jokes

Theorem: All numbers are equal.
Proof: Choose arbitrary a and b, and let t = a + b. Then

a + b = t
(a + b)(a - b) = t(a - b)
a^2 - b^2 = ta - tb
a^2 - ta = b^2 - tb
a^2 - ta + (t^2)/4 = b^2 - tb + (t^2)/4
(a - t/2)^2 = (b - t/2)^2
a - t/2 = b - t/2
a = b

So all numbers are the same, and math is pointless.

Theorem: All numbers are equal. Proof: Choose arbitrary a and b, and let t = a + b. Thena + b = t(a + b)(a - b) = t(a - b)a^2 - b^2 = ta - tba^2 - ta = b^2 - tba^2 - ta + (t^2)/4 = b^2 - tb + (t^2)/4(a - t/2)^2 = (b - t/2)^2a - t/2 = b - t/2a = bSo all numbers are the same, and math is pointless.

Theorem: All numbers are equal to zero. Proof: Suppose that a=b. Thena = ba^2 = aba^2 - b^2 = ab - b^2(a + b)(a - b) = b(a - b)a + b = ba = 0Furthermore if a + b = b, and a = b, then b + b = b, and 2b = b, which mean that 2 = 1.