"That's Nice" joke

Hot 4 months ago

Two Southern belles, one of whom was from Texas, were seated on the porch swing of a large white-pillared mansion talking. The first woman, who was not from Texas, said, "When my first child was born, my husband had this beautiful mansion built for me."
"That's nice," commented the lady from Texas.
"When my second child was born," the first woman continued, "he bought me that fine Cadillac automobile you see parked in the drive."
Again, the lady from Texas commented, "That's nice."
"Then, when my third child was born," boasted the first woman, "he bought me this very exquisite diamond and emerald bracelet."
Once more, the lady from Texas commented, "That's nice."
"What did your husband buy for you when you had your first child?" asked the first woman.
"My husband sent me to charm school," answered the lady from Texas.
"Charm school!" exclaimed the first woman. "Land sakes, child, what on earth for?"
"So that instead of saying 'who gives a shit', I learned to say 'That's nice!'" replied the lady from Texas.

Once upon a time, long, long ago there was a season when neither the Browns nor the Steelers made the post season playoffs. It seemed so unusual that the management of both teams got together and decided that there should be some sort of competition between the two teams, more...

"Darling," she whispered after they had finished making love, "Will you still make love like that to me after we're married ?"
He considered this for a moment, and then replied, "I think so.
I've always been especially fond of married women."

A man's wife is his better half, but his mistress is his better hole.

Two blondes walk into a bar. You'd think at least one of them would've seen it.

I put a hundred pounds on a horse.
The fucking thing collapsed.

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