"Nursery Rhymes" joke

Simple Simon met a Pieman Going to the fair
Said Simple Simon to the Pieman
"What have you got there?"
Said the Pieman unto Simon
"Pies, you dickhead!"

Mary had a little lamb,
It walked into a pylon,
10, 000 volts went up its ass,
And turned its wool to nylon.

Hey diddle, diddle, the cat did a piddle,
All over the bedside clock.
The little dog laughed to see such fun
And the cat died of electric shock.

There was a little girl, who had a little curl
Right in the middle of her forehead
And when she was good, she was very very good
But when she was bad, she got a fur coat,
. ... jewels, a sports car......