Mountgarret Jokes

Vice-Admiral Lord Mountgarret was addressing an all male gathering of sailors where everyone present knew as much about sailing as he. His lordship who had by then imbided more than his share of spirits decided to talk about his sexual exploits, of which he claimed to have had many more than they. The next morning, while his lordship was nursing his hangover in bed, her ladyship ran into one of the previous evening's audience while she was out shopping and asked him how her husband's speech had gone down.' He was a roaring success,' the man assured her.
'I am so glad,' said Lady Mountgarret.' I was terribly worried. He's only done it three times. The first time he was violently sick. The second time his hat blew off, and the third time he got all tangled up in the sheets!'