Magical Jokes / Recent Jokes

Q: Why did Snow White get kicked out of the magical kingdom?
A: She sat on Pinnochio's face and said,"lie to me baby...lie to me!"

One day a bunette, a redhead and a blonde walked into a thrift store. They noticed a strange-looking mirror in the back of the store, and asked the shop assistant what it was."It's a magical mirror," she replied. "If you look into it and say something true, it will give you your heart's desire. If you say something untrue, however, it will suck you into the mirror for eternity."The girls decided to give it s shot.The brunette stepped up. "I like ice cream," she said, and walked away with $1,000,000 in cash in her bag.The redhead stepped up. "I live in California," she said, and drove away in a sleek red sports car filled with spunky surfer guys.The blonde stepped up. "I think..." she started, and was sucked into the mirror for eternity.

There was a magical mirror tht showed the prettiest and ugliest people in the world. The mirror said that, May Honzirop was the prettiest and the ugliest was Shakira Hobo. May was going to go in front of millions of people to get a Guinness world record.
The mirror said, the day before May went on stage, "I think you'll brag about all your "success" and just become unpopular again.
May replied, "SHUT UP YOU STUPID MIRROR! I WILL THROW YOU AWAY AFTER I'M DONE!"
It was the next day. She was on stage with Shakira Hobo. She announced, now the mirror will choose the prettiest and the ugliest people."
The mirror was still upset, but still decided to answer anyway.
The mirror announced to about 25 million people, "The prettiest perso is Shakira Hobo, and the ugliest is May Honzirop, and that the truth!"
Everyone laughed at May. The mirror said, Payback!"
A minute later, May was piled in tomatoes.

There once was a magical bridge. A wise man told a blonde, brunette, and a red head that if they ran across it and wished to be any thing it would happen. So the next day all three of them went to the bridge. The red head went first. "I wish I was a dove!" and poof she turned into a dove. Next went the brunette. "I wish I was a dolphin!" and poof she turned into a dolphin. Next came the blonde. She ran as fast as she could and said "I wish I was....she noticed her shoelace was untied and said "CRAP!" and she turned into crap.

One day, down in the mystical forest, a magical frog was hopping towards a water hole. The forest was so enormous that the frog had never laid eyes on another animal before. But today, by chance a bear was chasing after a rabbit to have for dinner.
The frog called for the two to stop and said, "Because you are the only two animals I have seen, I will grant both of you three wishes. Bear, you can go first." The bear thought for a moment, and being the male he was, said, "I wish for all the bears in this forest, apart from me, to be female." For his wish, the rabbit asked for a crash helmet, and immediately put it on. The bear was amazed at the stupidity of the rabbit, wasting his wish like that.
It was the bear's second turn for a wish. "Well, I wish that all the bears in the next forest were female as well."
The rabbit asked for a motorcycle and immediately hopped on it and roared the engine. The bear was shocked that the rabbit was asking more...