Magical Jokes / Recent Jokes
There were 3 men: 1 white man, 1 black man, 1 mexican. They all came up to a magical bridge. There was a sign and it said "jump of and wish for anything and you will turn into it." The Mexican went first and jumped of and wished for money, and he turned into a bag of money. The black man went second and jumped of and wished for a car and he turned into a car. The white man decided he didnt need anything so he walked across and tripped over a loose board fell off and said crap!
A Chap walks up to another chap and says:
Chap - You're Merlin aren't you?
Merlin - Why yes. . it's nice to be recognised!
Chap - Bit of a Wizard. . I hear?
Merlin - Well Yes. . I've been told I'm skilled
Chap - Do tricks and things. . don't ya.. Magical stuff?
Merlin - Magical. .. yes that's correct
Chap - Turn Kings into Frogs. . and that sort of thing. . Is that right
Merlin - Well Yes. . I suppose I could Turn a King into a Frog!
Chap - Ever Mucked up. . Ya know, made a mistake?
Merlin - Well Yes. .. hasn't everyone?
Chap - Can you reverse a curse?
Merlin - Yes I can. .. with knowledge of who applied the Curse and the actual words of enchantment, I could do it. ... Why?
Chap - I'm Cursed
Merlin - Really. .. and how long have you been bewitched?
Chap - Years.....
Merlin - Do you know the words spoken over you to lay this curse?
Chap - Yeah. . can't forget them!
Merlin - What were more...
David Copperfield, magician and Charles Dicken's ripoff, has claimed to have found the Fountain of Youth...on his $300,000 a week resort in the Bahamas. Copperfield says that he has found a spring on his island that has magical properities, including rejuvenating plants that are withered and dying. Who knew that by giving water to plants that were withered and dying would bring them back to life. Take that cactus.
Although, Copperfield has yet to allow any guest sample the water, many are anxious to see if this spring does indeed have magical powers. Perhaps, this is the same magical potion he used to get Claudia Schiffer to fuck him.
There were 3 girls they were best friends. All of then were sooooooooo ugly that when you look at them you run away! One day the 3 girls were hiking in the forest when they saw a magical lake. There was an old man sitting on top of the rock and he told the girls that the lake was magical.
A frog leaps out of the magical forest where he has lived all his life and into a real forest. Since he lived in the magical forest he has magical powers. He sees a bear chasing a rabbit and thinks to himself, this isn't right, everyone should live in peace. So he stops the bear and rabbit and tells them that if they stop chasing each other he'll give them both three wishes. The bear thinks for a second and wishes that all the rest of the bears in the forest were female. Poof, all of them are female. Next the rabbit wishes for a crash helmet. The bear looks at the rabbit wondering why he would want a crash helmet. The bear thinks for a second making sure he makes a good second wish and wishes that all the rest of the bears in the country were female. Again - poof - all the rest became female. Then the rabbit wishes for a motorcycle. Now the bear steps back and looks at the rabbit in amazment. How dumb is this rabbit he thinks to himself. All he had to do was wish for money and he more...