"Steven Wright 02" joke

I've been doing a lot of abstract painting lately, extremely abstract. No brush, no paint, no canvas, I just think about it.

My watch is three hours fast, and I can't fix it. So I'm going to move to New York.

I like to reminisce with people I don't know.

I like to skate on the other side of the ice.

I'm so hyper. . . [Said with a very dull voice.]

If you can't hear me, it's because I'm in parentheses.

Four years ago. . . No, it was yesterday. Today I. . . No, that wasn't me. Sometimes I. . . No, I don't.

Is it weird in here, or is it just me?

A friend of mine once sent me a post card with a picture of the entire planet Earth taken from space. On the back it said, "Wish you were here."

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