"Bottle fed baby?" joke
A woman and a baby come into the doctor's office.
She is taken into an examining room and waits for the doctor.
After arriving there, the doctor examines the baby, and finds him not gaining much weight and asks the woman, "Is he breast fed or on the bottle?"
"Oh...he is breast fed!", replied the woman.
"Well then, strip down to your waist," orders the doctor.
She takes off her top and bra and sits on the examing table.
The doc starts pressing, kneading and pinching both breasts for quite a while in a very detailed and thorough examination.
The doc motions to her to get dressed, then the doctor says -
"No wonder this baby is so hungry. You don't have any milk!"
The woman with a wry grin on her face responds..."Well of course I don't."
"I'm his aunt - but I'm SURE GLAD I brought him in!"
Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!
A man arrives at the gates of heaven. St. Peter asks, "Religion?" The man says, "Methodist." St. Peter looks down his list, and says, "Go to room 24, but be very quiet as you pass room 8."
Another man arrives at the gates of heaven. more...
A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day, 5kg weight loss program.
The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her more...
Q:what did god say when the first black person came to heaven?
A:oops I must of burnt one!!
Arnold Schwartzinagor has a long one
Michael J. Fox has a short one
Madonna doesn't have one and
Bill Clinton uses his a lot
What is "it"?
A last name!
Now what were you thinking?